World Cup Jersey Power Rankings

With only 7 days until the World Cup begins, we thought we would take a different outlook on the biggest tournament in the world, channel our inner Tyra Banks, and rank the World Cup home jerseys from 1-32. Of course, we're no fashion experts, but it seems like a fun idea, and at least we can make fun of some of the ugly ones along the way. Let's go!

32. North Korea

?????

Well, at least the North Koreans know how to keep a secret. Apparently their official WC jersey has not been released yet. Major sites like World Soccer Shop feature a retro 1966 jersey, but nothing more recent than that. So, by default I guess... they come in at last on our list! Maybe Kim Jong Il (he of the oppressive communist regime and amazing golf game) will surprise us with a personal design that stuns the world!

***UPDATE: We finally did see the North Korean jersey today against Brazil, here's a photo from the UK Guardian that shows the jersey from Legea pretty well. I must say, it belongs near the bottom of the list with the unusual white striping down one arm and along the sides. Also, after you check out our Jersey Power Rankings don't forget to follow our daily World Cup coverage***

31. France

Ugh. Unfortunately for France, the only thing uglier than their jersey might be their performance in South Africa. The pinstriped away jersey is infinitely better. While the crest is unique (many teams don't have roosters on their jerseys), the white and red rib designs are awful. Were the lines supposed to meet in the middle, or is it supposed to look halfway done? It's not like the French to give up easy or anything... this jersey doesn't exactly belong in the Louvre of soccer jerseys.

30. Honduras

Rather plain, and we don't enjoy the crest right in the middle of the jersey. Add to that the spotlight of little-known shirt sponser Joma smack dab in the center above the crest, and you're left with a jersey that is rather uninspiring.

29. Japan

Japan's 2010 entry doesn't have the classic simplicity of years past. There's too much going on with the front of this jersey with the crest, flag, adidas logo, and red space in the collar. Plus, we're not sure if there is supposed to be a crazy embossing happening on the front of the jersey or not. More questions than answers means a very low ranking.

28. Switzerland

The Swiss Jersey is rather plain, until you look closely at the crest opposite of the flag. What is that thing? My guess is that it's a dude trying to play soccer... but it just looks like a bad piece of modern art plastered on a soccer jersey. Otherwise, the plainness of the red and white lacks pizazz (there's a nice fashion word, let's keep the wagon rolling!) or a cool retro look.

27. Denmark

Well, at least the Danish jersey isn't plain. With the red and white combo a popular choice among this year's World Cup teams, Denmark takes a new spin on the colors with random streaks of white bars that looks more like a classic game of Breakout (loved it on the Atari) than a national team's shirt. The red and white two-toned collar doesn't ooze class either.

26. Greece

While other old-school plain jerseys feature high on our list, Greece's entry doesn't for one simple reason - that annoying random stripe that encircles the jersey. Our hometown Crew are afflicted with the same stripe design, but at least the black and yellow take your eyes away from it. Here, it's spotlighted with the white background and puts the adidas logo off balance. They'd be much better off without it.

25. Chile

Chile promises to be one of the breakout teams of the 2010 WC, but they don't have one of the breakout jerseys. We like the unique flag design, but that's about it with Chile's shirt. The jersey features some feint piping up and down the sleeves and the side of the jersey which try to accentuate something, we're still trying to figure out what though.

24. Slovakia

The simple Slovakian jersey is more of a classical adidas look and is better than its similarly colored Greece counterpart. The blue does a nice job as an accent color, but we're not too crazy about the focus on the sleeves. Otherwise, there isn't too much to complain or rejoice about here.

23. South Africa

The yellow and green is always a great combo (see Brazil), and this jersey would probably seem much more of a classic if Bafana Bafana had a history of success. The jersey has some character with the imprints and it seems to flow together better than the earlier jerseys on our list. But, it's still got a ways to go to be a great shirt.

22. USA

This jersey has so much potential. Inspired by the 1950 design 60 years ago, the old scheme had a red stripe running down diagonally... and yet today we're left with a Miss America style featuring a faded sash running down the shirt. As long as Landon Donovan doesn't have to address world geography, than the US Americans should be fine... such as.

21. Ghana

Ghana's jersey is the first in our list to feature Puma's new design for its African jerseys for this year's World Cup. The jerseys feature the team's nickname or logo on the right shoulder. For the other Puma teams in the tournament, this has more of an effect than the single faded black star here. Also, we should note Puma's very cool African unity uniform to be worn by its teams in some of the run up games and as a clash kit to promote the year of biodiversity.

20. Uruguay

The Carolina blue color is always a winner, and while the random galaxy/sun/dynamo design that fills the shirt might not be a winner for some, we think it gives the Uruguay jersey some needed flair and uniqueness.

19. Australia

The Australian jersey has a very classical feel with the green shoulder and sleeve combo and the yellow shirt. Our only problem with the Aussie outfit is that it seems more like a rugby jersey than a soccer jersey.

18. Portugal

In what would surely be the favorite jersey of fans of Christmas, Portugal's new red and green look more faithfully represents their flag's colors than the previous maroon color, but it doesn't have the same aura of confidence like the vintage maroon did. Cristiano Ronaldo strikes fear into the hearts of defenders... but maybe less so in this kit. Ronaldo fans should cheer up though, the away shirt is much worse.

17. Mexico

El Tri do a good job here of using the three colors to accentuate a more traditionally modern design. The white/red collar works for Mexico and the red trim fits better with the green than Portugal's massive chest stripe. All in all, a solid selection, but one that doesn't make you want to rush to the stores.

16. Italy

Italy's jersey is boosted by the team's continued success, and in typical Italian shirts, this design doesn't do anything outlandish and has a traditional look. Again though, there is another weird embossing on the torso, which is for some reason all the rage in the sports world. That knocks this down a few pegs.

15. Nigeria

Another simple, sleek design from adidas. The green and white Nigerian colors go together splendidly, and the striping isn't as obnoxious here as it is with Greece, nor does the accent color dominate the sleeves as the Slovak jersey. The Super Eagle crest is also one of the best.

14. Germany

The German jersey grows on you the more you see it. The red, yellow, and black vertical stripe aligned with the old school crest gives it that '70s/'80s feel when the West Germans were such a dominant force. Their black alternate jersey is even better.

13. Algeria

12. Cameroon

11. Cote D'Ivoire

We have to group the next 3 African Puma jerseys together because they all feature the same template. Each jersey features an outline of the team nickname on the right shoulder. These three rank above Ghana though because of the coolness of the animal mascots over the black star. Basically, we ranked them from smallest to biggest - Desert Fox (perhaps the most unique), Indomitable Lion (certainly the coolest nickname), and Mighty Elephant (the best overall looking shirt). While each away jersey also has great color combos here, here, and here, they remind me too much of this wretched experiement from Nike a few years ago to gain elite status. You can check out the other African Puma selections here.

10. Paraguay

The first thing that strikes you about the Paraguyan jersey is why do they have the same jersey as Stoke City? Nevertheless, the wide vertical stripes are a classy design, especially with the red and white colors. We like to think that class is a theme in our Top 10... but then again I don't watch Project Runway, so who am I to judge?

9. Serbia

This is a jersey worthy of being in the Top 10 and being mentioned in the same breath as the classic shirt designs in this year's tournament. While it might fit Denmark better, the cross pattern from the Nike logo to the crest has a retro look while not seeming out of style. We only wish Nike would have done something similar with the USA jersey!

8. Korea Republic

Perhaps the flashiest of our Top 10, the South Korean jersey flows together brilliantly. While a lot of the other designs featuring the faded stripes, swooshes, sashes, and others don't work - this one does with the tigeresque stripes. Everything comes to the center and it is at least one modern-looking design that doesn't leave you shielding your eyes.

7. Slovenia

Perhaps the shock entry of our Top 10, but there's some quality about the Slovenian jersey that sits well with us. Maybe it's the mountainous green zig-zag that crosses the front, or just the recognizability (can't believe that's actually a word) of the jersey. Whatever the case, this jersey and it's alternate make Slovenia the head of the European underdogs... at least in the jersey department.

6. New Zealand

This may be one of the most plain jerseys there is, but it works for New Zealand. The All Whites get it right here, with the lone black fern and New Zealand Football on the crest matching perfectly with the plain white jersey. The black alternate jersey is one of the best jerseys in the tournament and is almost identical to their rugby counterparts.

5. Spain

The Spanish red and yellow always looks good. The hint of blue in the collar meshes well with the traditional colors here as well. Spain's shirt hasn't changed much in recent years, and its consistency has it in our Top 5. Then again, maybe it's just as good as the 1o before it, but because the team is better the jersey looks better? Any sabermetricians want to take a shot at that correlation?

4. Brazil

Traditionally, the yellow Brazilian jersey is near the top of any list, but this year they slide down just a couple spots due to the great improvements of a couple of countries going retro. It's simply a brilliant jersey, and when great players like Pele and Zico wear it, it only looks better. Quick trivia fact - did you know Brazil changed their jersey color from white to yellow after the 1950 upset loss in the Finals at home to Uruguay because they felt it was bad luck? Who knew?

3. Netherlands

This is a jersey that would make Johan Cruyff and Total Football proud. The black collar and numbering (totally awesome with the right angled look) harken back to the 70's and perhaps the most entertaining team to ever grace a pitch. That can do nothing but help your performance on the field and on our list.

2. England

The pinnacle though of the classic/retro jersey is the England shirt. Really, it's the collar that completes this jersey and makes it stand out in this competition or any other. The proper collar and plain white jersey just fits the English and is a perfect match between jersey and country. Just don't spill any afternoon tea on it!

1. Argentina

While any of our Top 5 jerseys could stake a claim for #1, it is Argentina that tops our list. The vertical stripes design and light blue/white color combination are a perfect match. There is a transcendence in Argentina's shirt that goes beyond soccer and is identifiable to any sports fan. It's a jersey that has been worn by some of the best in the game, and it will be befitting of the best in today's game, Leo Messi, to wear it this year as well.

So there you have our list! Put on your fashion hats and tell us what you think the best looking jerseys are and what you would be proud to wear at the local pub or hide in your closet next to the Philadelphia Eagles throwbacks. Whew, who knew trying to look good was such hard work.