What Are The Odds: World Series Preview

Time for RSS's World Series What Are The Odds Preview. We'll give you the odds on not only who will win and who will lose between the Yanks and the Phils, but some other juicy lines as well. A comprehensive preview of the entire World Series, Vegas style. Of course, these are lines and odds that you won't see anywhere else. Only Randall Simon's Sausages tells you like it is. Let's play the odds!

Buck & McCarver Annoy America - 1/5,000,000

Yea, this is going to happen at some point during the series. Whew, I hope the rest of the preview is this easy!

Brad Lidge Blows A Save - 4/1

Assuming Lidge has 4 save opportunities, he will at least blow one of them. The shaky Phils closer isn't exactly automatic in the big games (think Albert Pujols' blast out of Houston a few years ago). That, combined with a potent Yankee lineup that has produced late inning dramatics this season is a combustible formula for Philly.

Mariano Rivera Blows A Save - 40/1

On the other hand, Mo Rivera is much less likely to blow a save in this series. Then again, the ghosts of 2001 might still haunt the Yankee Closer. This might be a number that would be a good bet, especially for the Yankee haters.

Ozzie Guillen Says Something Stupid - 2/1

Out of all the possible player/coach analysts to hire for the World Series, you pick this guy? Ugh. How does he still have a job as a manager, let alone a guest commentator?? Then again, maybe he's going to try to offend a different group of people during each game's coverage. Let's go through some of Ozzie's greatest hits...

About A-Rod:

"Alex was kissing Latino people's @$es. He knew he wasn't going to play for the Dominicans; he's not a Dominican!" (Boy, that just screams impartiality doesn't it.)

About Ex-Players Confessing Steroid Use

"They're full of (bleep). You know why? Whatever happens in the clubhouse stays in the clubhouse."

About Magglio Ordonez

"He's a [bleep], that's what he is. He's another Venezuelan [bleep]. [Bleep] him."

About Jay Mariotti:

"What a piece of s#*t he is, f#$^ing [bleep] (gay slur)." "He's a garbage. He's always been a garbage. And he will die a garbage." (don't ask me what "a" garbage is...)

I don't understand the appeal to this guy, he's an obnoxious, offensive, loudmouth blowhard... then again, maybe that's why he was hired.

An Ex-Indian Wins A WS Game - 1/10

Well, seeing as how the two best pitchers in this series both plied their trade in Cleveland in the not so distant past, this is a pretty certain bet. I wonder what must be going thru the minds of Cleveland fans knowing that both Lee and Sabathia are pitching Game 1 of the World Series. Better yet, I wonder what must be going thru their minds knowing that Eric Mangini is coaching the Browns. At least they still have the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame!

Chances Joe Girardi Outmanages Himself - 3/1

#27 has shown a certain bad knack for wanting to manage just a lil' too much in search of title #27 for the Bronx Bombers. Especially in the late innings, there is a good chance that Girardi makes one move too many to cost the Yankees a crucial game. Oh, and that's in the AL, just wait until he gets to manage in an NL park. Oy! He might even try to send David Cone in to pitch at some point this series.

Ryan Howard Outslugs A-Rod - 5/6

We'll give Howard the slightest edge in this Titanic Battle of the Titans (redundant?). Both players have had awesome postseasons, yes, even A-Rod. But, we'll give Howard the slight edge because of the short porch in RF at Yankee Stadium. The robust lefty must be salivating over the New York bandbox.

Breaking Scoring Records - 15/1

While Philly and NY might have two of the most hitter-friendly parks in baseball, these teams will have to do some big time work to reach the meaningful run-scoring records. Of course, it was the Phillies and Blue Jays that scored 81 runs in the '93 Fall Classic. But, that record, and Game 4's 15-14 high scoring records should still feel fairly secure.

Fox Sets A Record For Worthless Camera Angles - EVEN

As if the constant band shots come bowl time were annoying enough from Fox, I suffered from vertigo while trying to watch the ALCS. In the late innings of Game 2, this was the sequence of camera shots:

Pitcher, Hitter, Fan #1, Manager, Pitcher Close Up, Fan #2, Player Scratching Himself In Dugout, On-Deck Circle, Pigeon, Blimp, Pitcher Close Up #2, Empire State Building, Hitter #2, McCarver Falling Asleep, Steinbrenner, Batman, Pitcher Close Up #3... Pitch

Maybe I should just try the radio broadcast...

Pedro Is Spooked By The Bambino - 3/1

Hmm, the number 3, hmmm. Pedro doesn't exactly have the best memories of pitching in the postseason at Yankee Stadium, and you can bet that you'll hear a "Who's Your Daddy" chant. Even though it might not be the House that Ruth Built anymore, maybe one or two of those spirits will make their way over to the new place and give Pedro a friendly hello...

A Shortstop Wins MVP - 7/1

Jeter and Rollins might be the two most clutch players on either roster. While Howard and Rodriguez might get walked and pitched around, these two might be more decisive in who wins or loses. Jeter has always come up big in October, and Rollins' key hits have been very important for the Phils in the past 2 years. Expect one of these two to step up in a huge way and lead their team to a victory.

Yankees Win, THHHEEEEEEEEEEE Yankees Win - 3/5

Well, when it is all said and done, the Yankees have to be favored to lift the trophy at the end. The Yankee bullpen and lineup has a distinct edge, and that will be enough to see the Bombers through. Of course, dealing with Lee and Hamels might be tough, but the Yankee lineup is potent enough to beat anybody. Even though the Phils are the defending champs, this isn't the Devil Rays. We've already seen the Twins and Angels melt against the Yanks, and Philly might do the same. But, most of all, the Yankees have had a sense of destiny about them all season. Whether it has been divinely arranged or not, the Yankees have always seemed like they were going to win it all this season. From the crazy wins, to A-Rod of all people producing, to their jovial behavior, all the intangibles have pointed to New York. PICK - Yankees IN 6

That's it for our full What Are The Odds Preview! Enjoy the Series and check out our own series... the Decade Series, returning very, very soon! Bye for now!